Ep. CXXXIX.
(This letter is written at a somewhat earlier date in
reference to the consent he had been induced to give to remaining for
some time longer as administrator of the See of Nazianzus. It is
certainly not addressed to Theodore of Tyana, and it is not known who
this Theodore is.)
He Who raised David His servant from the
Shepherd’s work to the Throne, and Your Reverence from the flock
to the Work of the Shepherd: He that orders our affairs and those
of all who hope in Him according to His own Will: may He now put
it into the mind of Your Reverence to know the dishonour which I have
suffered at the hands of my Lords the Bishops in the matter of their
votes, in that they have agreed to the Election,
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but have excluded us. I will not lay
the blame on Your Reverence, because you have but recently come to
preside over our affairs, and are, as is to be expected, for the most
part unacquainted with our history. This is quite enough:
for I have no mind to trouble you further, that I may not seem
burdensome at the very beginning of our friendship. But I will
tell you what suggests itself to me in taking counsel with God. I
retired from the Church at Nazianzus, not as either despising God, or
looking down on the littleness of the flock (God forbid that a
philosophic
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soul should be so
disposed); but first because I am not bound by any such
appointment: and secondly because I am broken down by my ill
health, and do not think myself equal to such anxieties. And
since you too have been heavy on me, in reproaching me with my
resignation, and I myself could not endure the clamours against me, and
since the times are hard, threatening us with an inroad of enemies to
the injury of the commonwealth of the whole Church, I finally made up
my mind to suffer a defeat which is painful to my body, but perhaps
not
bad for my soul. I
make over this miserable body to the Church for as long as it may be
possible, thinking it better to suffer any distress to the flesh rather
than to incur a spiritual injury myself or to inflict it upon others,
who have thought the worst of us, judging from their own
experience. Knowing this, do pray for me, and approve my
resolution: and perhaps it is not out of place to say, mould
yourself to piety.
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See Introd. to Ep.
157.
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Probably equivalent to
A Monk.