2. It is then my purpose to
prove to you, if I can, that the Manichees profanely and rashly
inveigh against those, who, following the authority of the Catholic
Faith, before that they are able to gaze upon that Truth, which the
pure mind beholds, are by believing forearmed, and prepared for God
Who is about to give them light. For you know, Honoratus, that for
no other reason we fell in with such men, than because they used to
say, that, apart from all terror of authority, by pure and simple
reason, they would lead within to God, and set free from all error
those who were willing to be their hearers. For what else
constrained me, during nearly nine years, spurning the religion
which had been set in me from a child by my parents, to be a
follower and diligent hearer of those men,
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save that they said that we are
alarmed by superstition, and are commanded to have faith before
reason, but that they urge no one to have faith, without having
first discussed and made clear the truth? Who would not be enticed
by such promises, especially the mind of a young man desirous of
the truth, and further a proud and talkative mind by discussions of
certain learned men in the school? such as they then found me,
disdainful forsooth as of old wives’ fables, and desirous to
grasp and drink in, what they promised, the open and pure Truth?
But what reason, on the other hand, recalled me, not to be
altogether joined to them, so that I continued in that rank which
they call of Hearers, so that I resigned not the hope and business
of this world; save that I noticed that they also are rather
eloquent and full in refutation of others, than abide firm and sure
in proof of what is their own. But of myself what shall I say, who
was already a Catholic Christian? teats which now, after very long
thirst, I almost exhausted and dry, have returned to with all
greediness, and with deeper weeping and groaning have shaken
together and wrung them out more deeply, that so there might flow
what might be enough to refresh me affected as I was, and to bring
back hope of life and safety. What then shall I say of myself? You,
not yet a Christian, who, through encouragement from me, execrating
them greatly as you did, were hardly led to believe that you ought
to listen to them and make trial of them, by what else, I pray you,
were you delighted, call to mind, I entreat you, save by a certain
great presumption and promise of reasons? But because they disputed
long and much with very great copiousness and vehemence concerning
the errors of unlearned men, a thing which I learned too late at
length to be most easy for any moderately educated man; if even of
their own they implanted in us any thing, we thought that we were
obliged to retain it, insomuch as there fell not in our way other
things, wherein to acquiesce. So they did in our case what crafty
fowlers are wont to do, who set branches smeared with bird-lime
beside water to deceive thirsty birds. For they fill up and cover
anyhow the other waters which are around, or fright them from them
by alarming devices, that they may fall into their snares, not
through choice, but want.
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Confess. b. i. c. 11; b. v. c.
14.