Chapter XII.
A question how we can attain to forgetfulness of the
cares of this world.
Upon
this I was at first moved
by a secret emotion, and then groaned deeply and said, All these things
which you have set forth so fully have affected me with still greater
despair than that which I had previously endured: as besides those
general captivities of the soul whereby I doubt not that weak people
are smitten from without, a special hindrance to salvation is added by
that knowledge of literature which I seem already to have in some
slight measure attained, in which the efforts of my tutor, or my
attention to continual reading have so weakened me that now my mind is
filled with those songs of the poets so that even at the hour of prayer
it is thinking about those trifling fables, and the stories of battles
with which from its earliest infancy it was stored by its childish
lessons: and when singing Psalms or asking forgiveness of sins either
some wanton recollection of the poems intrudes itself or the images of
heroes fighting presents itself before the eyes, and an imagination of
such phantoms is always tricking me and does not suffer my soul to
aspire to an insight into things above, so that this cannot be got rid
of by my daily lamentations.