96. But I have more easily found such as had
preserved their innocence than such as had fittingly repented.
Does any one think that that is penitence where there still exists the
striving after earthly honours, where wine flows, and even conjugal
connection takes place? The world must be renounced; less sleep
must be indulged in than nature demands; it must be broken by groans,
interrupted by sighs, put aside by prayers; the mode of life must be
such that we die to the usual habits of life. Let the man deny
himself and be wholly changed, as in the fable they relate of a certain
youth, who left his home because of his love for a harlot, and, having
subdued his love, returned; then one day meeting his old favourite and
not speaking to her, she, being surprised and supposing that he had not
recognized her, said, when they met again, “It is I.”
“But,” was his answer, “I am not the former
I.”