115. By these arguments I charmed myself,
and by degrees my soul relaxed and became ductile, like iron, and time
came to the aid of my arguments, and the testimonies of God, to which I
had entrusted my whole life, were my counsellors. Ps. cxix. 24. Therefore I was not rebellious,
neither turned away back, Isai. l. 6. saith my Lord,
when, instead of being called to rule, He was led, as a sheep to the
slaughter; Ib. liii.
7. but I fell down and
humbled myself under the mighty hand of God, 1 Pet. v. 6.
and asked pardon for my former idleness and disobedience, if this is at
all laid to my charge. I held my peace, Isai. xlii. 14.
but I will not hold my peace for ever: I withdrew for a little
while, Ib. xxvi.
20. till I had
considered myself and consoled my grief: but now I am
commissioned to exalt Him in the congregation of the people, and praise
Him in the seat of the elders. Ps. cvii. 32. If my former
conduct deserved blame, my present action merits pardon.