Chapter X.
How those who are on the way to perfection are truly
humble, and feel that they always stand in need of God’s
grace.
When
then holy men feel
that they are oppressed by the weight of earthly thoughts and fall away
from their loftiness of mind, and that they are led away against their
will or rather without knowing it, into the law of sin and death, and
(to pass over other matters) are kept back by those actions which I
described above, which are good and right though earthly, from the
vision of God; they have something to groan over constantly to the
Lord; they have something for which indeed to humble themselves, and in
their contrition to profess themselves not in words only but in heart,
sinners; and for this, while they continually ask of the Lord’s
grace pardon for everything that day by day they commit when overcome
by the weakness of the flesh, they should shed without ceasing true
tears of penitence; as they see that being involved even to the very
end of their life in the very same troubles, with continual sorrow for
which they are tried, they cannot even offer their prayers without
harassing thoughts. So then as they know by experience that through the
hindrance of the burden of the flesh they cannot by human strength
reach the desired end, nor be united according to their heart’s
desire with that chief and highest good, but that they are led away
from the vision of it captive to worldly things, they betake themselves
to the grace of God, “Who justifieth the ungodly,”
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and cry out with the Apostle: O wretched
man that I am! Who shall deliver me from the body of this death? Thanks
be to God through our Lord Jesus Christ.”
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For they feel that they cannot perform the good that they would, but
are ever falling into the evil which they would not, and which they
hate, i.e., wandering thoughts and care for carnal
things.
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Rom. iv. 5
.
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Rom. vii. 24, 25
.