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1.  In what state the good Isaaces has found me, he himself will best explain to you; though his tongue cannot be tragic enough to describe my sufferings, so great was my illness.  However, any one who knows me ever so little, will be able to conjecture what it was.  For, if when I am called well, I am weaker even than persons who are given over, you may fancy what I was when thus ill.  Yet, since disease is my natural state, it would follow (let a fever have its jest) that in this change of habit, my health became especially flourishing.  But it is the scourge of the Lord which goes on increasing my pain according to my deserts; therefore I have received illness upon illness, so that now even a child may see that this shell of mine must for certain fail, unless perchance, God’s mercy vouchsafe to me, in His long suffering, time for repentance, and now, as often before, extricate me from evils beyond human cure.  This shall be, as it is pleasing to Him and good for myself.

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